yeah. when you have one simple problem, it's no big deal, but when you have a hundred simple problems, they all swarm into one really fucking complicated horde.
for facing danger so much where you're from, you didn't even have a weapon on you when you drove the car into the house.
( clementine breathes out slow. one, two, three. she counts the numbers out before she picks it up and responds. she's known people to lose it- people who hurt in the heat of the moment.
people who kill like that. tim doesn't really strike her as the sort. he's not like kenny.
hell, he's not like clementine.)
you think you'll hurt someone when you don't want to?
[He'll hurt someone - he'll hurt someone else, he'll end up hurting the only person he knows who deserves it, but - that's not the part that concerns him. The first person in the crossfire is usually himself.]
[It always is.]
i guess i have a history of "violent episodes"
[That's putting it lightly.]
[And it's morbidly easier to comment upon that instead of the little black 14 on his self-harm risk assessment.]
( As a rule, Clementine never really trusts anyone. There's no one she trusts fully, completely, wholly even if there are people she trusts more than others.
It's just something else to completely lose everything else into believing someone would- someone would have her back no matter what. No matter anything else in play. She can't expect that of anyone so she can't fully, wholly trust anyone else.
She still somehow doesn't expect what he writes. )
like you've hurt people before?
i mean, i've hurt people before.
you just don't really seem like the type. i guess.
[In general, it's probably best not to trust someone like him. When he's not openly unreliable, and self-admittedly untrustworthy, he's flaky. When he's not forking the blame onto everyone else, he's generating more problems and being even more of a burden than usual.]
[When he's not setting people back, he's outright hurting them.]
issues that make my medical file look more like a textbook.
[He...really does not want to get more specific than that. But maybe he owes it to her to. He owes it to her to be fucking honest for once in his life, after she risked everything for him and Jay.]
so they're medical issues? like being sick or injured or something? cause that does sound like a lot.
( She was eight when the apocalypse happened. There's a lot she just never was aware of. She's smart, but there's so much she doesn't know because she never learned it. )
That must be rough and hard. Sometimes I feel like I'm kinda fucked up, but I don't know if I really am or not. Just how it feels. So they just have a big textbook of info about your brain? Does it help to have a textbook about it or does it make it harder?
both i guess. there's ways to deal with it sometimes wonderland likes to get in the way.
[So it's better, far better, to play it safe and just not arm himself at all. Not risk anyone getting hurt - any more hurt than they would already, just by being here - by his hand.]
i'm glad that you have a way to help deal with it. and if you're worried about hurting people and not being able to help it, i can understand why you wouldn't arm yourself, but you're better than most. most people would arm themselves anyway to keep themselves safe. screw the rest of the world.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
text, 7/18
thanks for helping us the other day.
you're probably the only reason jay's still alive.
no subject
you're welcome. it felt good to actually be able to help for once.
do you always crash cars into shit?
no subject
i'm not usually that stupid.
no subject
i'd ask what changed this time, but it's cause of jay, right? you didn't want him to get killed even if it meant nearly blowing yourself up
1/2
[Pretty much nailed it on the head.]
i couldn't
keep him safe from a lot of stuff back home
not sent
i owe him.no subject
to not be able to keep someone safe. you guys were in danger back where you're from?
no subject
it was more complicated than zombies but yeah.
no subject
they're dangerous as fuck but simple. makes it easier. ( it's people that are harder. )
no subject
it's harder when there's a lot of them
[Easier to run from, unless they're swarming you.]
no subject
for facing danger so much where you're from, you didn't even have a weapon on you when you drove the car into the house.
no subject
i don't really carry stuff like that.
maybe i should.
[He already knows George's opinion on that.]
no subject
why don't you carry anything?
no subject
[She was gonna ask. He knew she would.]
don't really trust myself around something like that.
no subject
people who kill like that. tim doesn't really strike her as the sort. he's not like kenny.
hell, he's not like clementine.)
you think you'll hurt someone when you don't want to?
why?
no subject
[It always is.]
i guess i have a history of
"violent episodes"
[That's putting it lightly.]
[And it's morbidly easier to comment upon that instead of the little black 14 on his self-harm risk assessment.]
no subject
It's just something else to completely lose everything else into believing someone would- someone would have her back no matter what. No matter anything else in play. She can't expect that of anyone so she can't fully,
wholly trust anyone else.
She still somehow doesn't expect what he writes. )
like you've hurt people before?
i mean, i've hurt people before.
you just don't really seem like the type. i guess.
no subject
[When he's not setting people back, he's outright hurting them.]
i don't want to.
[Most of the time.]
i've kind of got some
issues.
no subject
She killed Kenny.
She didn't want to. She had to. There was no other choice.
She just gets the feeling he means it differently than she does. )
I've hurt people before. Killed them.
What kind of issues?
no subject
[He...really does not want to get more specific than that. But maybe he owes it to her to. He owes it to her to be fucking honest for once in his life, after she risked everything for him and Jay.]
no subject
( She was eight when the apocalypse happened. There's a lot she just never was aware of. She's smart, but there's so much she doesn't know because she never learned it. )
no subject
my brain's kind of messed up a little.
[Kind of. Just a tad. A fraction.]
[A hair.]
no subject
That must be rough and hard. Sometimes I feel like I'm kinda fucked up, but I don't know if I really am or not. Just how it feels. So they just have a big textbook of info about your brain? Does it help to have a textbook about it or does it make it harder?
no subject
there's ways to deal with it
sometimes wonderland likes to get in the way.
[So it's better, far better, to play it safe and just not arm himself at all. Not risk anyone getting hurt - any more hurt than they would already, just by being here - by his hand.]
no subject
i'm glad that you have a way to help deal with it. and if you're worried about hurting people and not being able to help it, i can understand why you wouldn't arm yourself, but you're better than most. most people would arm themselves anyway to keep themselves safe. screw the rest of the world.
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)